Let It Go

I feel like I need to write this, and let it go once and for all.

My best friend was my cousin (I wrote about our relationship here).

Growing up I wore my heart on my sleeve, I was so open, so bubbly, no filter between my brain and my mouth. You got what you saw with me.

But then I started noticing that whilst the everyone new exactly who I was, I didn’t really know my closest best-friend. She was so closed off, having trust issues. Later on I learnt that her parents were having marriage problems, and were to divorce. This was never openly discussed in our family and to-date still has never openly been said. It’s just brushed under the carpet and not questioned by us kids because we never really saw her dad anyway, so his absence is not unusual. Point is, to-date she has never once mentioned this whole saga to me, or even indicated that it’s happened.

So I found that so weird. There I stood openly telling her everything about our household, my secrets, my feelings, and not thinking anything weird with being so forthcoming, but something as big as her parents divorcing and she never uttered a word to me. The lack of trust on her part was part of the turning events for me when I changed into into this bitter person that you have seen vent on this blog.

I thought she was so cool, so mysterious being that closed off. I felt that being so open as I was, was considered uncool. So based on the hurt I was feeling from the lack of trust she had in me and a bunch of other stuff happening in my life at the point, I decided I needed to close myself off.

I created the same monster that I am today trying to defeat.

There’s No Fool Like An Old Fool

Another article I came across that had my blood boiling (think I should stop reading these).

This article has been copied word for word from Daily Mail.

My greedy ex took everything and I’m a bitter wreck:

“My 66th birthday is approaching and I feel I want it to be my last. It all began when I was 15 and met Trevor. My father was difficult and domineering, consequently I married Trevor just after my 17th birthday.

We both became social workers and had the usual ups and downs, but our family life with four children was loving and close. In 2003, on our 40th anniversary, we renewed our wedding vows on a Tobago beach.

In 2004, I had cancer, and during this time Trevor was the most devoted, caring partner I could have wished for. I retired in 2006, looking forward to spending time with our grandchildren.

In 2006, Trevor became a senior lecturer. In 2007, he changed — saying the job was difficult.

He started going to conferences, couldn’t give details, would turn off his mobile at night. You guessed right — an affair with one of his students. At the time she was 28, he was 62. She’d been married twice and had three children by different fathers — the children are the same ages as three of our grandchildren. 

My Husbands Having an Affair and I Pretend I don’t Know

Firstly to clarify this post is not about me, I am not married and therefore I don’t have a husband who is cheating on me. Phew!

Ok so I came across an article which is titled: “My husband’s cheating – and I pretend not to know to shield my child”.

I am actually going to copy the article into this post because:

1) I know many people can’t be bothered to read it if I post a link to it.

2) The article is really interesting and I want you all to read it.

The article is below and my comments and opinions will be posted throughout in bold italic, because as you all know I cant resist ranting.

“My husband’s laptop is open on the sofa. I glance at it casually and my eye is drawn to an open email.

‘My darling girl,’ it begins, and the surge of shock I feel jolts me like an electric charge. My husband Will is an unemotional man, so I’m perplexed by this effusiveness. But I do not pry; I jump away as if stung.