But I Still Love You

cheating

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19 thoughts on “But I Still Love You

  1. I just wanted to share a link to an article and blog that I believe that your readers would find very compelling. The purpose of the blog was to avenge a friend whose husband left her and their two young girls for his employee. This article does a decent job of breaking down the blog: http://columbiaheartbeat.com/index.php/news/headlines/275-070512 . The blog itself is http://www.husbandhustling.net. The blog has over 30,000 hits so far and is somewhat of a sensation in central Missouri.

  2. Socialkenny PUA says:

    So you don’t think you can love someone yet cheat on them?

    So you don’t think Bill Clinton love Hillary because he had an affair with Monica Lewinsky?

    • I think if you love someone then you shouldn’t need to cheat on them.

      You’re probably going to say something along the lines of “its only sex and it doesn’t mean anything”

      But the picture really says it all; the fact that you willingly and selfishly did what you did knowing that at the end of the day it WOULD hurt your partner. If it wouldn’t hurt them then why not say it straight and not try to hide an affair or one-night-stand like everyone does.

      • thealphalife says:

        Instead of thinking about how bad people are who cheat on their partners, why not asking the more important question: Why should one promise fidelity to each other?

        This is a serious question. I have no answer except “fear”. If that should be the answer, then congrats, you have ruined your life.

        -Tal.

  3. That goes against everything that I (and the majority of the population) believe to be “love”. For me the whole concept of being in a relationship and being in love is about be faithful.

    So the promise of fidelity is a big deal and the whole point of the relationship.

    • thealphalife says:

      And that’s the reason why there are so many divorces. For your life you seem to seek freedom, but when it comes to courtship you are promising to constrain yourselves? Love wants to free you and your mind, not constrain it.

  4. Ariella says:

    I must disagree with this one. I believe that you can love someone and cheat. Respecting one, that is a different story, but love, yes. No matter how many times John has cheated, I know he loves me. I know that you may not be able to comprehend that, but there are people out there who cheat. It doesn’t mean they do not love.

    • In some cases that may be true, but like the picture points out, they knew what they were doing would hurt you. They knew what their actions were, so throwing the “I love you” after wards just seems pointless and empty.

  5. I agree 100%! Saying “but I still loved you” is just a way to try to cushion the blow and make it seem less terrible. The truth is, love is about putting someone else before yourself. That is the antithesis of cheating.

  6. Reblogged this on Being a Beautiful Mess and commented:
    “I never meant to hurt you” is such bullshit. If you are a conscious, thinking human being, then you know actions like cheating and lying WILL hurt the other person. Stop living in a fantasyland!

  7. Socialkenny says:

    Why the fuck am I not receiving notifications of new posts,etc.!!?Must be a wp glitch.

  8. DeCode says:

    Well, it depends. I’ve cheated on a few women, and a couple of them I loved to death! But they were not giving me what I needed in the relationship, yet what I was getting was not worth breaking off from them.

    Then as a woman there is an element to cheating that you will NEVER understand or comprehend. And that’s the fact that men do not associate sex with emotions. Sex for a male is a biological need akin to breathing or eating. A man can sleep with other women and never even once consider leaving his woman/wife, or love her any less. At the time it was merely an act of satisfying a need.

    A good way to gauge this is to observe how females and males react to being cheated on. Most women generally respond with self-doubt and wondering why he was not satisfied with her.

    Most males place the blame solely on her; we rarely react with thoughts of personal inadequacy. (Although we will take responsibility for enabling a situation where she could cheat, something I’ve notice females seem almost universally incapable of)

    • You’re right, I am a real girly girl with the whole romantic notion stuck in my head. So if I am in a relationship with someone I don’t really care how much the affair or one-night-stand was just about sex and lack of emotion. If you cheat, you cheat. It’s as simple as that. There are many women out there who are a bit more flexible about that than I am, and don’t see cheating as the end of a relationship. However I would outline my views at the beginning, so if the time ever came, they would know the consequences of their actions (end of relationship). So if they can’t handle that, then don’t get in a relationship with me. Simple.

      You said that you were completely in love with the women you cheated on. But as the picture above outlines, it doesn’t really matter. You still went ahead and pulled the trigger (cheated). I don’t know if the women found out about it and how they reacted? But the picture makes the point that if you pulled a trigger on someone and they lay bleeding on the floor, the “sorry’s” whilst they are wounded mean complete shit. You know what you did so the apology’s and ‘I love you’ means nothing.

      That’s another thing that I hate about men, if they cheat they expect the women to shut up and get over it. If women cheat, you guys throw them out the door before they can utter an apology. Double standards no?

      If the women you mentioned you were in love with cheated on you, how would you act? Let’s say that they insisted it was just sex (like you do) and that it didn’t mean anything. I am curious to know how you would act?

      • DeCode says:

        to your question about if the woman i loved (at the time) cheated on me, how would i react?

        i depends. i’m old enough to know and have experienced- first hand or vicariously- that in the “real world” women get away with cheating FAR MORE than men do. and have many more opportunities to do so.

        so when guys drop women for cheating it’s because the overall circumstances surrounding it are far more treacherous or have a greater impact (like she’s pregnant with some one else’s child, or passed off another lovers child as yours through out your marriage).

        then there’s the fact that usually -women being the more emotional species- when a woman cheats, it’s a not so subtle signal that the relationship is pretty much over anyway. where as with men; that’s usually not the case. (he just wanted some strange, or it was so convenient it was just to good to pass up)

        I’ve found that with women it’s NEVER just sex. even with sluts. it may start out that way, but once the act is over, and if it was good, she will start spinning a plot to make you apart of her life in some way or another. and if you are with a true slut (one who really doesn’t bond through sex, like women naturally are supposed to) then she’s not worth being in a long term relationship with anyway, and you (the male) are the dummy for committing to her.

        don’t get me wrong. i’m not saying cheating is good, or ok. i’m saying men and women deal with it differently, and the biological motivation and consequences are different as well.

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